acting baby

So many times, I've read of actors overcoming childhood shyness by taking acting lessons. This is something I attempted to do as an adult. Signing up was on my mind when I drove my cousin's (then) girlfriend to San Francisco to take an acting class. We assembled in the classroom for a brief introduction first, and when it came time to enroll, I went ahead and wrote my check. As I've written previously (Jester Joe!), attracting attention is not my thing but I'd never quite know just how I would respond to acting unless I took a class.

There was what I imagined: the process of reading a script augmented by countless rehearsals infused with seriousness and dedication - compared to what it turned out to be: mostly improvisation. At least, that's what I remember most. I dreaded it - not only was I driving to the city, but for this? I didn't have a good grasp of what improvisation was in the first place. If only the TV show Whose Line Is It Anyway? had been on the air prior to my taking this class, at least I would have known what it was like (not that I could have done it, but at least I'd have had an idea). Improv is supposed to be fun, but not for me. The first line that comes to my mind is "Stop looking at me!"

Finally, towards the end of class, we were given monologues to work on by our instructor. I have the distinct memory of our instructor handing out our monologues individually, saying something like "Steve, I thought of you when I found this monologue" to each of my classmates. But when it was my turn, I instead heard "Arthur, I couldn't think of anything for you, so here's this." I read through it, and said to myself: "I'm a dog?"

I don't regret trying an acting class though - I'd have greater regrets never seeing what it was like - but I do wonder why I ever signed up for a second class. Maybe I didn't want to think that I didn't give it enough of a chance. I guess I was searching for some sort of escape from being me. Which losing myself into a character might have done. But the ability to improvise is such a part of the creative process of acting, it's not something I ever would have enjoyed.