I was recalling recently how other kids used to always tell me that I was too serious when I was growing up. And I didn't understand what was so bad that it had to be pointed out. What's wrong with being serious? Didn't it mean that I was placing importance on something? That I was giving it value and attention?
It took me years to understand what they meant by being 'too serious.' I took a career class at the local junior college and as part of the course, we took several different personality and aptitude tests and one particular measurement stands out in my memory: it placed the word 'serious' on one end of a scale and the word 'cheerful' on the other, and we were to mark where we would say we were. So I finally figured out after all that time that people were telling me to be more cheerful. What they meant by 'too serious' was, oh, too dour or something like that. Which reminds me of another thing people have sometimes said to me: "Lighten up!" Okay, well, now I understand what they were/are trying to tell me.
Which reminds me of another example of a misunderstanding due to semantics: One of my roommates in college was having relationship problems with his girlfriend. He was feeling confused, but for some odd reason when he tried to communicate this to her, he kept using the word 'smothered' instead of 'confused.' So she backed away and tried to give him more space. Which confused him even more. And then he told her he was feeling even more smothered. So she gave him even more space. And so on... until they broke up.
Communication problems... c'est la vie .
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